


wicked game

by orphan_account



Series: endless love [1]
Category: NCT (Band)
Genre: 80's, Anal Sex, Angst, Body Worship, Bottom Mark Lee (NCT), Cowboys, Fights, First Time, Hand Jobs, Implied/Referenced Cheating, Lee Donghyuck | Haechan is Whipped, M/M, Smut, Top Lee Donghyuck | Haechan, Unrequited Love, Weddings, brokeback mountain inspired though i've never seen the movie, mark is getting married, markhyuck ain’t ever not gonna be in love, ya’ll gotta trust me tho
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-04-03
Updated: 2020-04-03
Packaged: 2021-02-28 22:53:27
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 7,252
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/23455075
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/orphan_account/pseuds/orphan_account
Summary: Donghyuck wills himself to keep his eyes on the counter, to memorize the cracks and dips in the wood, anything to avoid the sight of Mark smiling in the arms of another.Someone that’s not him.
Relationships: Lee Donghyuck | Haechan/Mark Lee
Series: endless love [1]
Series URL: https://archiveofourown.org/series/1718731
Comments: 18
Kudos: 175





	wicked game

**Author's Note:**

> korean cowboys !!!!!!!! all inspired by one of my mom's all time favorite songs. pls give it a listen before you read, it encapsulates all that i wanted to convey through my writing [here!](https://youtu.be/aid2vMbCNP8) (i had this song on repeat) 
> 
> i hope you like it :)

Nursing an empty glass of bourbon, Donghyuck takes one last sip, eyeing over the rim of the glass to stare at the scene in front of him. Mark dances in the arms of his fiancé, spinning her about the dancefloor with practiced ease that comes with being mellowed by alcohol. His chest hurts as a familiar laugh hits his ears, enveloping his sense of sound entirely. 

Tucking the brim of his hat in front of his eyes to shield his vision and heart from any more torture, Donghyuck steps down from bar stool with wobbly legs, gazing quickly at the clock so he doesn’t have to face Mark’s joy with someone else in his arms. 

_Someone else._

Donghyuck reads the hands of the clock blearily, sighing as he realizes it’s only twelve. Mark, everyone, would want him to stay longer. He trips over himself as he makes his way back to the bar, back to another drink. 

Sitting down with a grunt, Donghyuck waves over the bartender with a heavy hand. 

“Another bourbon, please,” He beckons, vision glazed with fatigue and a recognizable wetness appearing, “Make it strong.” 

“You got it.” The young man says, trying not to openly stare at the obviously struggling man in front of him, “It's on the house.” 

Wiping a hand over his face, Donghyuck smiles tearily, “Thanks.” 

While the other prepares the small drink, Donghyuck wills himself to keep his eyes on the counter, to memorize the cracks and dips in the wood, anything to avoid the sight of Mark smiling in the arms of another. 

_Someone that’s not him._

“Here you go, sir. What’s got ya’ all techy? It’s a busy night, you should be out on the floor.” The barkeeper says, placing his elbows on the counter in question. 

“Tonight’s not the night,” Donghyuck answers, picking up the newly made drink with an unsteady hand, wincing as the liquid burns his throat. He suddenly jerks forward, coughing gravelly as the drink gets stuck in his windpipe, the sensation causing his eyes to tear up. 

“Shit,” the barman utters, striking the choking man’s back harshly, “Here's some water.” 

Sliding up from where he laid on the bar, Donghyuck chokes out a, “Thanks again,” snorting sadly. 

“What’s got you taking a bender, sir?” The barman asks again curiously to Donghyuck’s displeasure, “It's way too bustling a night to be sitting by your lonesome.” 

“It’s a girl,” Donghyuck replies, not revealing the true extent of his predicament, “She’s gettin' hitched and I love her, I really do. Like no one else.” Donghyuck hiccups. 

“There's nothing I can do bout’ it, either. They seem happy, and I ain’t gonna spoil it for em’.” The man ends his drunken rant with another hiccup, slumping down to the counter again. 

The barman frowns wistfully, patting Donghyuck’s back in tame consolation. 

“Maybe ya’ could tell em’ beforehand just for the sake of it, jump the gun, see if they feel the same before they tie the knot.” 

Donghyuck chortles. “I'd rather be buzzard food than do that.” The man slowly glides up from his resting position, throwing the rest of his drink back, “I'll take another one.” 

The barman just eyes the other, heart going out to the shaken man in front of him. 

“It’ll be right up.” 

~

Attempting to get up from the bar stool on wobbly legs, Donghyuck blanches as he feels himself about to be sick. 

“Someone help him to the bathroom, he’s gonna throw up!” The barman, or Kun rather, as he introduced himself as the two got acquainted over the night, yells over the music playing late into the hours of darkness. 

Mark, as always, is there for the inebriated man in a flash, leaving the group of people who he was previously dancing with on the floor. 

“I’ll be back, Hyuck’s gotta get to the bathroom,” Mark says loudly, wrapping a firm arm around the woozy man he pulls from where he’s settled against the bar. 

“Let’s go, Hyuck.” 

The trip to the bathroom is a struggle, Donghyuck continuously falling over his functionless feet. 

“We’re almost there, Hyuck.” Mark placates the shickered man, “Almost there.” 

Upon arrival, Mark drags the other to the nearest available stall, kicking the door open with Donghyuck still in his arms, setting the other on the floor as he heaves up the alcohol he’d had earlier. 

“You shouldn’t have drunk so much, Hyuck.” Mark says gently, hands smoothing over Donghyuck’s back as he struggles to catch his breath before vomiting again. 

Wiping an elbow across his mouth, Donghyuck sits up to answer with a petulant tone, still reeling from the liquor, “What’s it matter to you, Mark?” 

Mark rolls his eyes, arms crossed over his chest, “Because I have to take you home, jackass.” 

“You don’t need to worry about that, Mark,” Donghyuck replies, falling to the ground in a drunken heap, “Stay here with Mina tonight, I’ll get a ride from Johnny.” 

Uncrossing his arms from his chest, Mark grabs for the other’s hands from where he lays on the bathroom ground, “No, Hyuck, let’s go home now, you need to rest.” 

Finding Donghyuck’s hand, Mark tries to pull the other up, but alas, the other is too heavy with dead weight. 

“Hyuck, please, let’s go home—” 

Mark yelps as he’s pulled to the ground, effectively cut off by the sour taste of Donghyuck’s lips. Mark’s eyes widen, pushing against Donghyuck’s chest with limited strength before both his hands are captured in the other’s. 

“Sto—stop Donghyuck,” Mark flails, trying to escape the incessant assault to his lips, “You're drunk!” 

“I am, aren’t I?” Donghyuck questions, laving his tongue across the exposed surface of Mark’s neck. The other moans before catching himself. 

“Donghyuck, stop!” Mark yells, shoving the drunk man to the opposite end of the stall, breathing labored as he catches his breath, heart beating traitorously. Donghyuck just laughs humorlessly, laying his head in his hands as he realizes what he just did. He continues to chuckle much to the other’s confusion. 

“Hyuck?’ Mark questions, starting to hesitantly crawl over to where Donghyuck sits.  
“Are you hurt—”  


“ _Stay over there!_ ” Donghyuck yells, hand going up as if to shield himself from Mark, “Stay over there, please. Let me gather myself, and then we’ll go. Please leave me for a few minutes.” Donghyuck finishes quietly. 

Mark stares at him intently before nodding in understanding. 

“I'll go tell the others.” He gets up, grabbing his hat from the ground that he must’ve lost during the scuffle. Marks trods over to the stall door, opening it softly, leaving the stall with one last look at Donghyuck’s shaking form on the floor. 

~

The car ride is silent. 

Mark is quiet as he steers his red pickup down the empty roads, only the light of the moon illuminating the trees the duration of the ride. 

Donghyuck has not so much as glanced Mark’s way since he hobbled out of the bathroom, gaze weary as he watched Mark explain the situation to the others. Watches as everyone, including Mark, frowns in disappointment. Watches as Mark pecks his fiancé on the lips he’d touched with his own just ten minutes ago. Donghyuck didn’t say goodbye to anyone, using his state as an excuse not to speak. No one said goodbye to him either. 

Donghyuck studies the greenery as they speed by, taking off his hat before cranking down his window to stick his head out the truck, sighing as the breeze flows off his skin, through his hair. Mark watches with baited breath the display beside him, gripping the wheel until his knuckles turn white as Donghyuck screams into the wind. 

Slipping back into the truck, Donghyuck finally regards the other with a heated stare, harsh breathing distracting Mark as he drives. 

“Hyuck—” Mark starts, glancing at the other. 

“Drive, Mark.” Donghyuck cuts off, turning his head to return to regarding the trees. 

~

The two end up at their shared house, Mark wanting to room with the other until the day he and Mina finally tie the knot. 

“It’s because you are always first for me, Hyuck. No one else can replace you.” Mark had explained in the past. 

_Was_ always first. 

“I’m gonna shower.” Donghyuck says speedily, stumbling out of the truck door before closing it with a slam. 

He treads up to the house, unlocking the door with shaky hands, and shuts it with a reverberating echo. The man slides down the door, feet giving in on themselves, and crashes to the floor with a cry. 

“Fuck.” The man strains as he reaches up with his flannel to wipe his damp eyes, “Don't cry, damnit!” Donghyuck straightens his legs out, boots thudding against the linoleum as he exhales resolutely, "Don't cry.” 

Placing a quivering hand on the floor, Donghyuck pushes himself up with as much arm strength as he can muster in his state, gripping the wall beside him for stability. Stumbling to the bathroom, Donghyuck guides himself by muscle memory, the sensation of the peeling wallpaper his map, the darkness of the late night clouding his vision. The man stops in front of Mark’s room, examining the contents of the space and committing it to memory after what could be the last time he sees everything after tonight. 

Continuing the burdensome trip, Donghyuck finally topples through the entryway of the bathroom, body flying into their jack & jill vanity before gazing up at his reflection through the mirror. The bags under his eyes shun him, sleepless nights spent dreading the news after Mark told him about the engagement. The fading tone of his complexion mocks him, days spent disregarding everything that used to be important after he saw the band on Mark’s finger. 

Donghyuck strips of his clothes, gathering everything in a pile by the doorway for later. He turns the knob of the shower, promptly stepping into the spray of water, ignoring the goosebumps that rise on his skin from the cold. Donghyuck runs his hands through his wet hair, smiling at the beginnings of warmth starting to fall out of the showerhead. Turning to grab the bottle of body wash, he squeezes the liquid into his hands, lathering himself until the feeling of his hands on his skin start to feel like they’re no longer his own. 

“Mark.” Donghyuck glides his hands down his soap slicked body, wrapping a firm hand around his erection. “ _Mark._ ” 

Barely managing to hold himself up, the man strokes himself to the beat of the water cascading down his body, making the beat of his heart speed itself. Thoughts of Mark only makes Donghyuck quicken his pace. 

“Shit.” Leaning back against the wall now, arms giving out under the pressure and slickness of his previous position, Donghyuck brings an arm up to his mouth to silence his whines. The man grips himself tighter at the thought of Mark’s lips on his, and slows down to elongate his pleasure and pain at the thought of those lips on another’s. 

Clamping down on his arm, Donghyuck nears his end, hardly able to keep his strength even on his spot against the wall, legs shaking as he inches closer to his high. 

_No one can replace you, Hyuck._

Those words ring in his head before he climaxes, Mark, like always, being the catalyst of his self-gratification. Mark, like always, being the basis for everything he does. Mark just being himself has Donghyuck whimpering into his arm, eyes rolling into the back of his head as he erupts, spunk hitting the wall before being swept down the drain, never to be seen again. 

Donghyuck promises himself to never cry to Mark’s name again, water washing away the sins he committed tonight down the hole at the bottom of the shower, at the bottom of his heart. 

~

Leaving the bathroom with just a towel wrapped closely around his waist, Donghyuck inhales as he feels a gust of cool air hit his face from where he just exited the steam filled room. Occupied with throwing his dirtied clothes in the laundry hamper, Donghyuck doesn’t notice the form resting atop his bed, Mark wide-eyed at seeing Donghyuck so blatantly bare. 

Clearing his throat, Mark watches as Donghyuck turns briskly on his heels, eyes large like an animal scrutinizing its prey. Donghyuck bristles. 

“Mark what are ya’ doing in my room, huh?” The man is cornering himself into the back of his own bedroom, out of fear or something else, Mark doesn’t know, “I need to rest.” 

“I heard everything, Hyuck. Everything.” 

At this, Donghyuck steps from the corner he’d kept himself in, prowling slowly towards Mark like the other was indeed his prey, his meal. 

“What all did ya’ hear, Lee? Tell me.” Donghyuck whispers, stopping in his movements at the sight of Mark standing up, eyes tearful. 

“You love me, don’t ya’, Donghyuck?” Mark asks, almost silent, voice flying away from him even in the close proximity of the two in the room. Donghyuck loses all coloring to his face at the weighty statement the other has stacked against him. Donghyuck doesn’t answer him, doesn’t even look at the other, choosing to observe the overflowing bin of laundry to the side of the room. 

At this, Mark clenches his jaw in suppressed anger. Raising his fist, Mark throws a punch against Donghyuck’s cheekbone, resounding crack bouncing off the walls of the room. Donghyuck falls to the floor, breathing heavy, eyes glaring up at the other with fire lining his vision. He spits a bloodstained wad from his mouth, staining the carpet near his feet. 

Donghyuck then pounces on the other, hurling a punch of his own on Mark’s face in pure fury. At words unsaid, at things that could’ve been done, the what-ifs. At Mark, at himself. 

Mark loses his balance, tumbling to the ground, and Donghyuck follows right after, having thrown the entirety of his body weight into the strike against Mark. 

The two exchange blows of their own onto each other: to ribs, to legs, to arms, to the stomach, each strike a crude reminder to the other that they are there, present, in each other’s arms. 

“Fuck you, Mark.” Donghyuck yells, pain shooting through his side as the other jabs him in the ribs, bony knuckles giving him quite an advantage. 

“Shit, fuck you too, you bastard.” Mark screams back, anger reciprocated, before Donghyuck knees him in the crotch. 

They roll around for a while, shooting expletives and fists towards the other, with Donghyuck gaining the upper hand at one point, arms bracketing the other’s head, sweat produced from the romp landing on Mark’s forehead. Mark expects the other to lay one down on his face, so he shields himself with his arms crossing over his skull. Flinching in response to the touch, Mark is startled in the least when Donghyuck clasps one of his hands is his, kissing the bruises that have started to form on Mark’s knuckles. 

Bringing Mark’s hand up to his face with shaky hands, Donghyuck caresses his own cheek with Mark’s fingers, eyes deep with feeling, reveling in the sensation of the calloused fingertips brushing his cheek. Turning his heavy gaze away from Mark’s face, Donghyuck tugs on the other’s arm softly, extending it, before leaving soft kisses in his wake. Mark flushes deeply at the display, attempting to pull his arm free from Donghyuck’s clutches, but the other just pushes on, pressing harder against the skin of Mark’s arm. 

Donghyuck advances down Mark’s arm, from his wrist, to his elbow, all the while smoothing fiery lips on skin as he moves, before coming to a halt at the meeting point of Mark’s shoulder and collarbone. Mark whines as the other bites fervidly on the bone, sucking harshly before laving his tongue along the length of Mark’s neck. 

“ _Hyuck!_ ” Mark cries, trying to cover his face with his hands, but Donghyuck is not having any of it. 

“I want to see ya’, hyung, let me see ya’.” Donghyuck continues his route, peppering kisses up the expanse of Mark’s neck, letting loose, darkening the coloring of Mark’s skin with intent. The man moans at seeing the results; Mark looks like a work of art. His work of art. 

“Hyuck, please,” Mark begs, reaching up with his hands to encircle Donghyuck’s jaw, winding their legs together, “Please.” 

Willing to do anything as long as Mark is happy, the man complies, lips meeting passionately in a frenzied kiss, Donghyuck resting between Mark’s legs as Mark holds the other for leverage. Pulling at the other’s clothes, Donghyuck desperately unbuttons Mark’s shirt, even ripping some of the buttons off the garment entirely. Getting the hindrance past Mark’s head, Donghyuck dives back in, the two moaning in harmony as Donghyuck asks for entry to Mark’s mouth the only way he can right now, wet muscle slipping between the other’s lips without resistance. 

Groaning, Donghyuck grips Mark’s shoulders, tugging upwards to silently request to head towards the bed. Moaning in agreement, Mark envelops his arms around the other’s shoulders as Donghyuck picks him up bridal style, pecking his cheeks warmly. 

“Mark,” Donghyuck deposits the man tenderly on the sheets, tucking himself between the space of the other man’s legs, lips frantic as they shake with thoughts of Mark: kissing Mark, touching Mark, breathing him in. Mark, Mark, Mark. 

Donghyuck runs his hands softly through the other’s hair, pulling his neck back to again leave his love spots there, “Wanna jack you off.” 

Donghyuck pushes his pelvis roughly into Mark’s, searching for the friction he craved and finally found. Rutting against the other, Donghyuck groans as he bites down again on the exposed skin of Mark’s neck, “Will ya’ let me?” 

Mark all but screams at the sensory overload, crying out before answering Donghyuck’s question, “Yes, oh god, yes.” 

Smirking at the response, Donghyuck places a tender kiss upon Mark’s cheek before moving down towards Mark’s bare chest. Eyeing the pink buds that Mark tries to shamefully cover, Donghyuck grabs Mark’s hands and places them above his head, intertwining their fingers so Mark can’t try to cover himself again. Resting his lips around Mark’s nipple, he sucks on the bud before nibbling gently, eliciting a sharp cry from the man below him. 

“Hyuck, I can’t, please,” Silencing the man’s breathless cries, Donghyuck shifts to the opposite nipple and repeats the same action, smiling upon garnering the same cries of pleasure from Mark. 

Planting pecks on each side of Mark’s rapidly moving ribcage, Donghyuck finally moves downwards towards Mark’s belly button, licking the line of hair that disappears below the hem of the other’s tight jeans. 

“Up, up.” Donghyuck utters, assisting Mark in removing both his jeans and boxers, ogling openly at the sight of Mark’s half hard dick. The other blushes profusely at his full nakedness, shifting like he’s going to cover himself, but Donghyuck eyes the man, gaze heavy, and Mark runs his hands through his hair to distract himself from Donghyuck’s staring. 

“Hurry, Hyuck, I can’t take this.” The other cries. Conceding, Donghyuck places a firm hand around the circumference of Mark’s member, spitting in his palm before stroking him to his full height. 

“Shit.” Donghyuck can’t take much of this anymore, either. The man in front of him is a vision: sweat running down the dips and rises of his body, muscles clenching and releasing in response to the grasp Donghyuck has around his dick. Donghyuck starts stroking with the intent of seeing Mark unfurl in front of his eyes, quickening his pace on the upstroke, gripping tighter on the downstroke, squeezing around the head occasionally. 

“Hyuc—Hyuck!” The other yelps, seemingly nearing his climax if the clamping of his jaw and seizing of his limbs is anything to tell by. Donghyuck helps Mark through, bending over the other to mold their lips together to show that he’s there, he’s here. Mark’s breathing only deepens at the display, Donghyuck kissing his neck before Mark tightens his grip around Donghyuck’s back, cry of Donghyuck’s name falling from his lips as he spills over the other’s hand. 

Donghyuck is star struck at the primal beauty he beholds in front of him, eyes glued to the other’s face as he strokes him beyond completion, Mark whining at the overstimulation. 

“Hyuck, I—” Mark whispers over the cloud of silence that stretches over them, a comfortable one, as Donghyuck grabs a washcloth from the bathroom, wiping Mark and his hand down. 

“What is it, Mark? Are you okay?” Donghyuck asks concerned, knowing it took a lot out of Mark with the way he’s still lying down, catching his breath as evidence. 

Sitting up slowly, Mark gazes steadily at Donghyuck, no room for reconsideration as he states, “I want ya’ to fuck me.” 

Donghyuck swears his whole world spins on an axis. Mark, his best friend since childhood, the love of his life, the man who’s going to get married next month is asking Donghyuck to fuck him. 

_What a wicked thing to say._

“I mean— of course, you don’t have to do that, I’m sorry if I made you uncom—” Mark is quickly cut off by the vehement lips of Donghyuck, silencing the words that Donghyuck never in a million years thought the other would say to him. 

“Do ya’ have lube anywhere?” Guiding the other onto his back, Donghyuck continues to plant deep kisses against Mark’s lips, not letting the other respond until he gets his fill. 

Breaking away for air, Mark gasps out breathlessly, chest rising for air, “Mina and I haven’t done it, so no I don’t have any in my room.” 

Donghyuck leans back to sit on his knees, studying the man in front of him with large eyes, still unable to comprehend what Mark has just said. Unable to fathom the fact that maybe, possibly, Mark was a virgin in both senses of the word, both parts of his body. 

Clearing his throat, Donghyuck runs a hand through his long locks, continuing to gaze at Mark in front of him, naked, on his bed. 

“I might have some lotion. I’ll be right back.” He whispers, setting a kiss to Mark’s side. 

Hurrying to the still damp aired bathroom, Donghyuck rips open the cabinets, contents spilling out as he looks for the cursed bottle of lotion. Spotting it, he hastily grabs it, rising from the floor with a shaky hand on the countertop. Donghyuck eyes his face in the mirror, gazing at his rosy cheeks, his glazed over eyes. Folding his body over the sink, Donghyuck clenches his teeth to bite down the incoming onslaught of emotions he feels. Gasping, the man lifts himself from the above the bowl of the sink, regarding his form once more before turning to head back to the man on his bed. 

_This man is only gonna break your heart._

Exiting the bathroom, Donghyuck’s gaze drops to the shape on his bed, Mark’s head thrown back as he stokes himself while waiting for Donghyuck’s reappearance. Climbing over the other, Mark whines as Donghycuk kisses down the ridges of his body, lips drawing patterns into the skin. 

Mark trembles, “Take your clothes off too, Hyuck. I don’t want to be alone.” 

“Never Mark, never are you alone.” Gripping the ends of his shirt bunched up from the result of tonight’s events, Donghyuck pulls it over his head, hair falling into his eyes as he appraises Mark’s reaction. The other does the same, tracing lines into Donghyuck’s torso. The two’s stares lock onto each other, not yielding in the slightest to the reciprocated heat of fire eyes. 

Keeping his gaze on Donghyucks golden glow in the moonlight, Mark envelops the other’s hand, pulling him down on top of his cold body, relishing the warmth that emanates from Donghyuck’s skin. 

Pecking the rise of Mark’s prominent cheekbones, Donghyuck asks, “Are you sure you want this, Mark? You don’t have to do this for me—”

“That’s not what this is!” Mark yells, brows furrowed in anger at Donghyuck’s words. He runs an unsteady hand down his face, 

“Just hold me, please.” Mark sobs, tears welling in his eyes. Donghyuck’s heart lurches at the display, winding his arms around the other’s thin body. 

“I’ve got ya’, hyung.” Tapping at the other’s side in silent request to turn over, Donghyuck assists the man through his turmoil, settling soft palms on the other’s side, counting the ridges of Mark’s arched spine. 

“Lift your hips, hyung,” Sliding his hands down slender hips, Donghyuck kisses the indents on the small of Mark’s back, the other exhaling detachedly. “There ya’ go.” Continuing downwards, Donghyuck laves his hot tongue against the supple flesh of Mark’s ass, licking a stripe against the pink hole between the other’s cheeks. 

“ _Ah!_ ” Adjusting to the foreign sensation, Mark tries to pull his hips back, before being stopped with the gentle palms of Donghyuck’s caress. 

“Breathe, Mark,” Donghyuck placates, whispering sweet words into the other’s skin, “We can stop if you want—” 

“No, Hyuck, I want this!” Mark all but shouts over the heat of the room, “I want you.” 

Nodding his head though he knows Mark can’t see the gesture, Donghyuck grabs the lotion from where it rests at the foot of the bed. Smoothing a hand down Mark’s back, Donghyuck pulls the other’s hips up high, exposing Mark’s ass to the elements. Warming up the thick liquid between his fingers, Donghyuck kisses Mark’s bowed back one more time before gliding the tips of his fingers over Mark’s tiny entrance. The other’s body jerks as Donghyuck penetrates his hole with the pad of a finger, legs barely managing to hold his own form up. 

“Are you okay, Mark? Does it hurt?” Donghyuck questions upon hearing the other’s resounding grunt after entering. 

“It’s just...different.” At that, Donghyuck chuckles fondly, Mark responding back with a thin laugh of his own before shifting his hips, getting adjusted to the mildly uncomfortable feeling. 

“Go on.” Moving his waist, Mark turns to look over his shoulder to give Donghyuck a shaky smile. Donghyuck’s heart almost manages to escape his chest. He kisses the flesh of the other’s ass, before pressing his long finger in until the second joint. Mark shakes at the feeling, head shooting up from where it previously laid on Donhyuck’s pillow, mouth open in a silent scream. Donghyuck placates Mark’s whimpers with caresses and lips on hot skin, but Mark seemingly cannot keep quiet. 

“Hyuck, try more, move.” Never one to deny Mark anything, Donghyuck prods his fingers into the other until there is nowhere else to move, digit hidden entirely in Mark’s quivering hole. Mark is silent for a minute, sounds of heaving the only sound filling the room before he swirls his hips in quiet request for Donghyuck to continue. 

“You’re doing so well baby.” Taken aback by the endearment that unconsciously slipped out, Donghyuck pushes in a second finger, curling the digits until he finds Mark’s sweet spot, aiming to distract Mark from the words that came from his mouth. 

“ _Oh!_ ” Mark grunts upon his prostate being rubbed, “Hyuck! Right there!” Beaming in response to Mark’s enthusiasm, Donghyuck pulls his fingers out slowly, much to the chagrin of Mark who groans at the loss of feeling, before ramming them back into the warm body. Falling into the soft surface of a pillow, Mark’s cries are muffled by the fabric, so Donghyuck chooses to add a third finger to the mix, wishing to hear Mark scream into abandon. 

His wish is granted. 

“Fuck! _Donghyuck!_ ” Mark keens as Donghyuck presses the pads of his fingers against sensitive bundle of nerves inside him, gripping the sheets of the bed as he instinctively works against Donghyuck’s digits. 

Lifting his head up from where it rested on the pillow, Mark cries in response to the feeling of Donghyuck covering his leaking member with a soft palm, scorching lips leaving trails of fire on Mark’s skin. 

“Hurry, Huyck. I need you, now.” Mark whimpers while holding the covers in a vice-like grip, knuckles turning white, babbling nonsense from the sensory overload. 

“I’m here, Mark, I’m here.” Donghyuck places tender touches upon Mark’s waist, helping the other flip over onto his back, watching the man before him with a blistering gaze. 

Mark’s intakes of air still rock his body, and Donghyuck eyes the rapid movement of his chest, scrutinizes his work on Mark’s neck, bruises still blossoming in color. With a weighty stare still capturing Mark’s entire being, Donghyuck pumps lotion into his palms, slicking the opaque liquid over his tall erection. Hearing Donghyuck moaning so openly at the sensation, Mark whines, resting his own palm against the heat of Donghyuck’s member. 

“Hurry, Donghyuck,” Mark whispers despereately into the air of the night, eyes pleading, “Please.” 

Grabbing for the man above him, Mark uses up all the strength he can muster to pull Donghyuck into his jelly arms, still reeling from his orgasm. Slicking more lotion on Donghyuck’s member, Mark inhales deeply as Donghyuck lines up to his puckered hole. 

“Are you ready, hyung?” Donghyuck peppers kisses across the entirety of Mark’s face as he pushes the head of his dick against the other’s awaiting body. 

“Hurry!” Mark cries, yearning for Donghyuck to finally give him what he’s been waiting for. 

As Donghyuck enters Mark’s heat, he swears he sees stars. Bright, hot stars that remind him of the man below him. 

_Out of reach._

“Ah!” Mark groans beneath him, hands winding about the sheets for even a semblance of sanity as he’s overwhelmed by the amount of pleasure overtaking him. Donghyuck watches from his knees, before giving into the tight pressure, eyes rolling into his head as he reels from Mark’s warmth. Leaning forward from his stance, he rocks gently into Mark, sinking even further into his heat with gentle pushes until he bottoms out, eyes shut tight as he catches his breath. 

Mark isn’t doing any better, the man looks like he’s about to pass out from the inability to breathe. 

“Mark, breathe.” Donghyuck brushes his lips across Mark’s chest, not making any movements in Mark’s warmth until the other calms down. Donghyuck runs his hands through the other’s hair, kissing the pulse of his neck. 

“Are you okay, Mark?” The man being questioned doesn’t answer, reduced to nonsense words, and just settles his feet on the bed before impaling himself on Donghyuck. Donghyuck collapses on the other with a groan, intertwining their hands together in affirmative, placing a deep kiss on Mark’s lips before thrusting harshly. 

“Shit.” Donghyuck keeps a steady pace, plunging himself onto the other man’s prostate, claiming a jarring yell out of the man beneath him. 

Mark, beneath him. 

Pulling their joined hands above Mark’s head, Donghyuck propels forward, insistent as he fucks Mark, their body’s rocking together towards the headboard of the bed with the power of Donghyuck’s hips. 

“ _Hyuck!_ I—I can’t!” Mark tosses his head to the side, revealing his purpled neck to the man who painted the bruises on him, biting down on the sheets as he drowns in pleasure. 

“I’m not gonna last, hyung,” Donghyuck groans as Mark clenches tighter, signaling a rapidly approaching climax, “Shit.” 

Freeing their hands from each other, Donghyuck clasps a sweaty palm around the calf of Mark’s leg, placing one on his shoulder, kissing the muscle wetly as he thrusts languidly into Mark’s hole. The other croons, placing a foot flat on the bed to meet Donghyuck’s hips with his. Flustered at the display, Donghyuck meets Mark’s thighs hurriedly, dirty sounds of slick and slaps ringing throughout the room. Donghyuck cries, mind ceasing to think of anything but _Mark, Mark, Mark_ as he thrusts in abandon. 

“Ma-Mark, I love ya’, I love you, _I love you—_ ” Donghyuck falls into the other’s chest where he’s pulled down as he comes into Mark with a high cry, eyes damp with tears. Stroking Donghyuck’s back through his peak as he continues to drive into Mark, the other screams as he reaches his end, spilling between their stomach’s at Donghyuck’s words. 

Donghyuck’s head lands on the other’s rising chest, exhaling as calm exhaustion overtakes him, lulled to sleep with the tranquil touch of Mark’s hands holding him, the rhythm of Mark’s heartbeat in his ear. 

Letting darkness to enshroud his senses completely, Donghyuck regards the somber voice he hears as part of his dreams. 

“I love you too, Donghyuck. I love you, too.” 

~

Rising to the smell of cigarettes and the sound of a stereo’s low tones, Donghyuck blearily spots Mark looking out the moonlit window, dressed in his day clothes, hat hiding the shine of his eyes. 

Clearing his throat, Donghyuck rests against the backboard as Mark's gaze roams to his form, mouth that took Donghyuck’s kisses sucking in the tobacco of his cigarette. Dongyuck frowns. 

“Those things will kill ya’, hyung. When did you start smoking so much?” Donghyuck crawls towards Mark from his place on the bed, wanting to share any closeness he can with Mark now that their time together will be limited. 

“When I realized I loved you and couldn’t do anything about it.” Mark doesn’t turn away like Donghyuck would, instead stands firm in the moonlight, the brilliance illuminating the serious expression plaguing his face. Donghyuck want to kiss his scowl off. Mark doesn’t deserve to be unhappy. 

Donghyuck does look away. 

From Mark’s gaze, from Mark’s words, from Mark’s heart as he swears his breaks in two. 

“Why didn’t you say anything, Mark?” Donghyuck whispers, voice almost nothing as Mark runs a frustrated hand down his face, through his hair. 

“What was I supposed to do, Donghyuck?” Mark questions, volume of his voice rising in the small room, “Say, ‘I’m in love with you but I have to pretend I’m in love with someone else, and my parents want me to get married?’ I couldn’t do that to you, Hyuck.” Mark scoffs, bringing the sleeve of his flannel up to wipe his damp eyes, “I couldn’t do it.” 

“Of course ya’ couldn’t, Mark,” Donghyuck yells over the music playing over the stereo, “Now look what’s happened. I can’t be with you, greet you when you come home, make meals for ya’, ride with ya’, cause’ you were scared.” Donghyuck plants a rocky foot on the ground, stomping towards where Mark has stood frozen. 

“Why couldn’t you stop pretending there was nothing between us? Don’t you wanna be free?” Donghyuck jabs his finger at the other’s chest before falling to the floor in a heap, shaking with pure emotion and from the cold wind that hits his naked body from the window. 

Mark drops to his knees, holding the man he loves in his arms, trembling through his own tears. Mark stokes the other’s goose bumped skin, trying to ease the pressure of the sobs racking his whole body. Mark tenderly grabs the other’s chin, pulling his face towards him to meet his eyes. Donghyuck won’t meet them. Mark kisses the other anyways, wiping the tear tracks from Donghyuck’s golden cheeks, disregarding the tears staining his own. 

“Donghyuck, please. Don’t for a second ever doubt my love for you. It’s always been there, always will be. Forever. Please don’t forget,” Mark places one last kiss upon Donghyuck lips, deep and full of things he can’t convey to the other through words, “I have to go, it’s going to get light out soon.” 

Donghyuck deflates in on himself, cursing at the man who stands on wobbly legs, heart reaching out for the other as he stalks toward the door. 

_I knew this was familiar._

Mark freezes at the exit, hand hesitating in grabbing the knob of the door before he opens it, taking one last glance at Donghyuck’s curled form on the floor. Mark’s heart breaks. 

_All too familiar._

~

That’s the last Donghyuck hears of the man. 

Sees of him, feels of him, touches him. 

The day of the wedding is fast approaching, and as Donghyuck opens the pack of cigarettes Mark left in his room, the tiniest piece of himself he gave to Donghyuck besides his heart, the man lets himself weep. He lights up a cigarette, inhaling the tobacco before wheezing harshly, the poison in his lungs too much for him. 

The poison that is Mark too much for him. 

~

When Donghyuck enters the barn venue with his newly pressed vest and tie, he knows he’s late. 

_I should’ve arrived later._

He leans against the grand doors, awed as he watches Mina walk down the aisle with tails of her dress being carried by young children, basketfuls of flower petals sprinkled in front of her angelic form. 

_She looks beautiful._

But Mark is the one who takes his breath away and catches it in his hands, keeping Donghyuck’s soul for himself. The man looks ethereal. His suit is a copper color that matches the scheme of the venue: copper and white. Mark’s hair is swept from his face, though few hair’s escape into the line of his sight, hat atop his head as usual. The two are the true picture of beauty, a gorgeous couple. 

Donghyuck makes sure to stay back in case the other guests notice him and beckon him over. He wants to see Mark give himself to another with his own eyes, to witness it for himself so he knows it’s real and not just a nightmare. Then he’ll leave. 

Donghyuck watches as Mina walks weightlessly atop the platform to join Mark, the two gazing at each other, small smiles gracing their faces. Donghyuck’s going to be sick. 

“Dearly beloved, we are gathered here in the sight of God, and in the presence of family and friends to join together this man and this woman in Holy Matrimony, which is commended of St. Paul to be an honorable estate, instituted of God and therefore is not to be entered into unadvisedly or carelessly, but reverently, joyfully and in the love of God. Into this holy estate these two persons present come now to be joined.” The priest starts. Donghyuck begins to feel lightheaded at the words, the speech solidifying the fact Mark is going to leave him, for good. He doesn’t hear the rest of it, can’t hear the rest of it, until the fated phrases ring through his ears. 

“Do you, Mina Kang, take Mark Lee to be your lawfully wedded husband? Do you swear before God and this company that you will love, honor, cherish, respect, and comfort him, in good times and bad, in sickness and in health? Do you promise to share your joys and sorrows, help him when he needs help and turn to him first when you need help, and forsaking all others, to be faithful to him alone?” 

“I do.” the bride answers. Donghyuck whimpers. 

“Do you, Mark Lee, take Mina Kang to be your lawfully wedded wife? Do you swear before God and this company that you will love, honor, cherish, respect, and comfort her, in good times and bad, in sickness and in health? Do you promise to share your joys and sorrows, help her when she needs help and turn to her first when you need help, and forsaking all others, to be faithful to her alone?” 

Donghyuck tips his head back, trying to stop the tears from flooding from his eyes. It doesn’t work. 

He leaves before he can hear the final words of the vows, gone from the ceremony like he was never there, though his heart bursting in his chest reminds him that this is happening. 

Mark really isn’t his anymore. 

~

Arriving at their shared house (not so shared anymore because Mark hasn’t been there since their night together), Donghyuck flings the front door open, marching hurriedly throughout the house with wetness covering his eyes. He storms into the closet, digging through the overwhelming amounts of clothing he has to find what he’s desperately searching for. 

Eventually, the suitcase he was looking for turns up, and Donghyuck starts to grab everything he can reach: clothes, shoes, books, little trinkets of his life with Mark, and stuffs them into his suitcase. 

_I have to get out. There is nothing here for me anymore._

Remaining oblivious in his frenzy, Donghyuck fails to notice the sound of a door opening, fails to notice the silhouette of a man motionless in the doorway of the room, watching the other intently. 

Donghyuck fails to notice the person creeping behind him, fails to notice them raising their arms, until he feels a solid body against the back of his. Yelping in surprise, Donghyuck tries to push out of the arms, fearing for his life, but the other has Donghyuck enclosed in a firm grip. Accepting the fact that he cannot move anymore, Donghyuck gives in to the tight hold of the person, jolting when he feels wetness stain the back of his shirt. 

“I couldn’t do it, Hyuck,” Mark whimpers into Donghyuck’s shoulder, nuzzling his cheeks onto the other like a child, “I couldn’t.” 

Eyes widening upon hearing Mark’s broken voice, Donghyuck turns in the others’s arms, gasping as he sees that the man is still in his vest and tie. Donghyuck nods, taking Marks’s face into his palms with his hands shaking in disbelief that Mark is actually here, in the flesh. 

“What happened?” Donghyuck questions easily, still shocked by the fact that Mark is in his room, dripping with sweat after running from his own wedding. 

“It wasn’t you, Donghyuck,” Mark sobs into his neck, tears sliding down the sensitive skin of Donghyuck’s nape, making the other shiver, “I thought I would be fine without you, that if I said you could be happier without me, I would be fine. But it has to be you, Donghyuck,” Mark sniffles into his hand, looking up at Donghyuck with anguished eyes. 

“It has to be. When I saw you leave, I knew I had to too. I will always follow you, Donghyuck, wherever you go, whatever you do.” 

At that, the man breaks down, slumping into Mark’s arms, the other also falling, the two collectively dropping to the floor together to cry onto each other’s lips. 

“You have everything of me, Hyuck, you have all my firsts, and I plan to keep giving you my all. I can’t pretend that I don’t want you anymore.” Mark whispers intensely into Donghyuck’s ear. Donghyuck just presses his frenzied lips against the other’s, expressing feelings of love through touch. 

“Mark, let's get out of here.” Donghyuck murmurs passionately, standing up before offering Mark a steady hand. 

He knows what he wants, and this time, is going to make sure he keeps it, 

“I never thought you would ask,” Mark replies softly, grabbing Donghyuck from behind the legs to carry him bridal style to his red pickup, suitcase in tow. 

_Forever._

~

“Where are we going?” Donghyuck questions curiously, eyeing their intertwined hands resting between them on the console of the car. 

“Somewhere I can love you freely, Hyuck.” Mark replies gently, bringing their joined hands up to his lips, kissing the back of Donghyuck’s hand. 

Donghyuck just smiles, gripping his hat tighter on his head before cranking the window down and sticking his head out of the truck, reveling in the feeling of the wind at his face, Mark’s hand in his, the radio playing in the backround. 

_The world was on fire and no one could save me but you,_  
_It's strange what desire will make foolish people do,_  
_I'd never dreamed that I'd love somebody like you._

**Author's Note:**

> they're going to California ⸜(ؔᶿധؔᶿ)⸝ IF YOU MADE IT TO THE END, I HOPE YOU ENJOYED READING! + weddings don't know how they work.... ANYWAYS as always, thanks for reading!


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